Do I want to?

This sucks. 

It's an endless squalor which devours my mind,

 and brings my egregious

 yet superfluous

 thoughts to life

 and with disdain in my heart 

This is hard to carry on through.

    I have a dubious mind

nothing amiable takes the lead

 nothing salutary to obsorb. 

I would like to annihilate it all

 destroy all of This

skip to the end and let charitable thoughts take the lead,

 chase the coarse side out.

   I do not want

 to do This anymore.

Yet 

The thought of leaving This,

brings vulnerability to my soul

 and I find myself in an endless hole of doubt 

and a certain will to destroy It.